Monday, October 02, 2006

Todays a new day..............

Saturday I was really down..........in bed all day feeling bad......Sunday I drove up 2 my aunts about an hour and a half away. She gave me some money and filled my gas tank up............I went to her monthly brunch with her sister friends. She figured I needed the support from older sisters who have been where I am now................

I was happy 2 see some of my aunts girlfriends who I had not seen in a while. Her best friend of over 30 years was there and she is like an aunt 2 me as well!!!! It's nice and comforting to hear from older sisters the struggles and the stories.......some of them although just meeting me, really gave me words of wisdom and faith to really make me feel better. I'm glad I went............My aunt paid for my brunch and I was thinking shit I could use this $4o for a million other things............but my aunt reminded me that in all this I still have 2 enjoy life..............

So today is a new day and I look foward to whats ahead.............even though it's the 1st of the month and I can't pay my rent today.........I KNOW THINGS WILL WORK OUT!!!!!!!

THANKS FOR ALL THE SUPPORT BLOG FAM!!!!! IF I GO M.I.A. AGAIN YOU WILL KNOW IT'S CAUSE MY CABLE/INTERNET GOT SHUT OFF......LMAO

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

theres always a lesson............

Hey blog fam.............

still searching for a J.O.B. who would think that a nurse would have such a hard time finding employment..............

One of my bestest girlfriends is a bartender. Last nite was her birthday and she had a REALLY big party at the club she works at. The owner and I were setting up yesterday afternoon and she asked me 2 be a cocktail waitress for the party because sdhe had fired a gurl the nite before. Of course I said yeah......cause 1: the owner is hella cool 2 me...she always always takes care of me when i'm there and 2: it was my gurls birthday. I worked the party and I made about $70 in tips!!!!! YEA!!!!!

When I got home last nite and counted my ones and fives I started 2 cry................even though it was only $70 it meant sooooo much 2 me because I have N.O.INCOME. I AT THAT MOMENT WAS HUMBLED!!!!! This time last year I was making 3 times that a DAY. Sitting back in my comfy lil office listening 2 yahoo tunes on my computer.......half working, blogging my ass off, taking 2 hour lunches with boss lady.....a year later i'm waiting tables at my girlfriends job, serving drinks 2 my friends..................my how things can change in a year............

From this whole ordeal I have learned so much!!! If any of you have ever lost a job you know how I feel........

I have learned 2 take NOTHING for granted. not that i did in the past but this experience has reminded me constantly!!!

I have learned to better budget my money!!!! I have been living off of $1000 less monthly probably a little more that........

I have learned how to ask for help from friends and family without feeling bad.

I have learned that my job does not make me the woman I am!!!!!

Most important i learned 2 excercise my faith.........

Even though things are dark right now I keep reminding myself that things are always darkest before the dawn.........I keep reminding myself, he has never let me down before!!!!!!

Thanks for the prayers and well wishes!!!!!! I will keep y'all posted!!!!!!!

theres always a lesson............

Hey blog fam.............

still searching for a J.O.B. who would think that a nurse would have such a hard time finding employment..............

One of my bestest girlfriends is a bartender. Last nite was her birthday and she had a REALLY big party at the club she works at. The owner and I were setting up yesterday afternoon and she asked me 2 be a cocktail waitress for the party because sdhe had fired a gurl the nite before. Of course I said yeah......cause 1: the owner is hella cool 2 me...she always always takes care of me when i'm there and 2: it was my gurls birthday. I worked the party and I made about $70 in tips!!!!! YEA!!!!!

When I got home last nite and counted my ones and fives I started 2 cry................even though it was only $70 it meant sooooo much 2 me because I have N.O.INCOME. I AT THAT MOMENT WAS HUMBLED!!!!! This time last year I was making 3 times that a DAY. Sitting back in my comfy lil office listening 2 yahoo tunes on my computer.......half working, blogging my ass off, taking 2 hour lunches with boss lady.....a year later i'm waiting tables at my girlfriends job, serving drinks 2 my friends..................my how things can change in a year............

From this whole ordeal I have learned so much!!! If any of you have ever lost a job you know how I feel........

I have learned 2 take NOTHING for granted. not that i did in the past but this experience has reminded me constantly!!!

I have learned to better budget my money!!!! I have been living off of $1000 less monthly probably a little more that........

I have learned how to ask for help from friends and family without feeling bad.

I have learned that my job does not make me the woman I am!!!!!

Most important i learned 2 excercise my faith.........

Even though things are dark right now I keep reminding myself that things are always darkest before the dawn.........I keep reminding myself, he has never let me down before!!!!!!

Thanks for the prayers and well wishes!!!!!! I will keep y'all posted!!!!!!!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

sorry it's been sooooo long!!!!!!

Hey all!!!! My youngest is adjusting well 2 high school!!!! Yeah!!!! I have now "limited" his my "crackspace" time!!! LOL My oldest is still working at C.O.S.T.C.O. he even goes in on his off days!!!!!

Me, i'm still hanging in there with young buck.....it is what it is......hell sometimes I forget his age......the only time I remember is when one of my gurls reminds me........LOL

My unemployment ran out..........I thought it was good for a year cause it said on every check: "your claim expires 2/17/07" so my ass never being on unemployment before thought I had a year..................not that I would stay off for a WHOLE year........antywho..........I got my last check and it was only for one week and I just figured I was at my half way mark so I had 2 re-apply..............I get on line and fill out the form.......got a letter on Friday that simply said "NO MORE MONEY DEE" WHAT?????? I cried for 5 minutes where the old me as y'all know would have cried for DAYS!!!!!! so now in 2 weeks I will have no check in the mail and i'm a lil scared but I know things will work out!!!!!!

I'm on the GRIND...........searching everyday........y'all wish me luck and send up a couple of prayers for your gurl!!!!!!!

I promise I will try and keep up with my blog and catch up with y'all!!!!!!

I hope all is well with you all..................

Thursday, August 10, 2006

my space must be laced with crack................

Hey blog fam!!!!! No I'm not off naked with young buck.........I wish..he's been out 2 sea for a few weeks. He will be home Friday though..........WOOO WHOOO!!!!!

I haven't been able 2 blog because my youngest has discovered MY.SPACE. Err time I think about getting on the computer he's on it..............shit I wake up at midnite he's on it............I wake up in the morning, he's on it!!!! What the hell??????? My oldest was into it for about 5 minutes last year and now he's sooo over it!!!!

So what's up with me???? Well same ol shit. My baby got registered for high school.....i'm more nervous than he is. He starts on the 21st. The oldest is still working at C.O.S.T.C.O. He will start city college soon. I told him I don't care if he takes ONE class he HAS 2 go!!!!!!

I haven't started looking for work yet..............I am working on my resume though.........I am just not motivated.......i think i've been off 2 long............

had a date with big country on Sunday. he's leaving for 6 months in a few weeks and that solves that dilema...........LOL

well lemme go catch up with all of you~~~ I will have 2 fight for mor computer time.............LOL

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Where in the world is big country?????

What ever happened to "big country"?~?~

y'all remember "big country" don't you??? Southern gentleman very handsome..lot's of charm...a lot closer to my age(still younger though). Well ever since the night he canceled our dinner date and "young buck" called and offered to "entertain" me for the evening........he has been around constantly........"big country" left for a few weeks and then when he got back........"young buck" was keeping me VERY busy. I do talk 2 "big country" every now and then. He has been gone a lot(out 2 sea).

About 3 weeks ago I went 2 "big countrys" and I took a picnic type dinner....we had dinner and watched movies and I thought hmmmmmm "I still like him" dude is funny as hell (very important 2 me)................BUT the whole time I was with him, I felt like I was sort of "cheatin" on "young buck"(who was out 2 sea)..................I was out with my girlfriend last week and "big country" joined us and had a few drinks with us..............we danced and had a great time......he walked me and my girlfriend 2 her car and asked me 2 come home with him and I DECLINED!!!!!!! what the hell??????

Here is the problem...............I don't really know how 2 be a "playa" so 2 speak..........my girlfriends say "well if you are not in a relationship with "young buck" you can see "big country" also.....one says "men do it"..I.JUST.CAN'T. I suppose if I take out the "grown-up-naked" parts I could.........LOL

Then there is the whole "big country" is closer 2 my age.........."young buck" is a baby. "big country" would be the better choice for sooooo many reasons...............BUT "young buck" keeps me smiling, makes me feel 25, and the nakedness is AWESOME!!!!!

so for now I just share texts and e-mails and an occaisional "clothes on" visit with "big country" and give the majority of my attention 2 "young buck" because i'm just not able 2 do both!!!!!! PUN INTENDED!!!!!

Monday, July 10, 2006

let's talk about "young buck"

What's up with "young buck"????

First off let's not confuse him with "mr.25" he didn't make the cut. Why you may ask?????

1. he didn't have a car.

2.he didn't like 2 eat at the buffet (if you know what I mean) it was open once and he refused 2 partake........BOOO

3. he didn't have a car

4. he asked me 2 take him 2 the airport one Thursday and pick him up on Sunday night. I did cause i'm nice like that........he didn't offer 5 cent for gas!!!!!! you can fly to Virginia for the weekend but can't put $5 in my tank?????? mmmkkkaayyy LOSE.MY.NUMBER!!!!

5.DID i MENTION HE DIDN'T HAVE A CAR??????

O.K back to "young buck"......HE HAS A CAR!!!!

He makes me smile. He seems to go outta his way to say something nice daily.

"Dee I love your hair" I have never ever had a man mention my hair!!!! EVER!!

He plays in my hair ALL.THE.TIME. not just when we are having naked grown up fun!!!! ( I like my hair pulled....T.M.I. but hell it's my blog)

He calls me by my REAL name!!!! What y'all didn't think my birth name was Dee did you????

He sometimes calls me "sunshine"
"good morning sunshine" "can I please speak 2 sunshine"

He tells me i'm sexxy. He appreciates my "thickness"

He's a gentleman...........period!!!!

He's funny as hell........so important for me cause i'm a little on the silly side as well!!!!

He's tall enough for me 2 wear my highest heels and he's still taller than me!!!!!

Dark skinned and handsome!!!!!
He's not afraid 2 call me on my shit. He tells me just what he feels right then and there......even if I don't ask or want 2 know. I like that and need it from time 2 time.

Now for the great part............................THE.GROWN.UP.NAKED.FUN.IS.AWESOME!!!!!!

He never ever ever gets tired!!!! Ever!!!! How cool is that???? He is very very verbal!!! That's a plus for me!!!! I don't care if you sing the alphabet....just say something!!!!! He lives on the ship so we get 2 have hotel sex!!!!!! WOOO WHOOOO!!!! Now some of you may be saying "so what Dee what's the big deal about hotel sex" well lemme tell ya...............

when you are a single momma you have 2 be really careful.......sneaking around being all quiet and stuff.....sneakinking him out before the kids wake up......sneaking him in after they go 2 bed, which is really hard with 2 teenagers by the way!!!!!!

When at a hotel, I just turn into some one else...............i can scream like a wild banshee..............walk around naked..................sleep in............get more in the morning...........all theese things others take for granted..................I get to be grown up.....even if only for the weekend!!!!

Now I could go on and on but I will not bore you with the details.The best part is he makes me smile!!!!! PERIOD!!!!! When I have doubts and start 2 feel bad about the age difference he simply says" I make you smile right? You're happy right? Then what's the problem???? I don't have a problem.......I like you and you like me"

So no matter what happens.........this is "young bucks" season....or maybe he's here for a reason.......I don't really know but i'm gonna enjoy the ride!!!!!!!

Thursday, July 06, 2006

o.k o.k i'm posting..............stop cussin me out.......

I hope everyone had a great 4th....I had a blast. I freaking 4got it was the 4th weekend until Friday............I guess since i'm all gaa-gaa over "young buck" LOL

Saturday I went 2 a que at a park with bestfriend and her youngins. It was o.k. I didn't know anyone but hey that never ever stopped me. The food was extra yummy but the peeps were not very friendly. I did know one lady there. She had been in a co-workers/friends wedding about 4 years ago and she remembered me. WHOA that was like 6 years ago. She told me what a great job I did decorating the reception. The host and hostess are her aunt and uncle.Did I mention the food was yummy?????

Sunday I just chilled. I sat outside with my neighbor and his parents and drank beer. He lit up his frill and I threw a couple of burgers on it when he was done. Why is it that we can't let a good fire go 2 waste????? What is that about????? Or is it just me????? I be like oh that's a good fire....lemme go pull a chicken outta the freezer!!!!!

Monday nadda..........ate ice cream all day.........no really!!!! Ice cream sammiches, push ups and theese popcicles by dryers......YUMMY they are made from real fruit and you need 5 servings daily right????? so shit I ate 5...........

The 4th a que again with best friend and the kiddies.....theese people were a lil more friendly....we had a great time then James dropped us off(our designated driver) at our favorite hole.in.da.wall. 2 have free holiday drinks. The thing I love most about this place is there is a nice mixed crowd. There are 20's 30's 40' 50's even 60's and older. There is always entertainment. I could sit for HOURS and listen 2 the stories from the older folks......and when they get on the dance floor WATCH out!!!!!! The other thing I love about that place is my gurlfriend is the bartender................What????

Last nite I went 2 a little graduation party/dinner for a friend who got his B.A. I had a great time as usual!!!! He is a member of the American legion so he had the party at his post. I was a HIT with all the old men.......LOL I danced with half of them in the place. I heard my friend Ron telling the older gentleman at the end of our table "yep that's Dee the life of the party" One gentleman I pulled out on the floor told me he hadn't danced in over a year because of his arthritis. I can't imagine not dancing or being able 2 dance.......he said "gurl you make a man wanna dance all nite" LMAO was he being a dirty ol man???? if he was I didn't mind cuz we had a ball. Everytime I got back 2 the table there was a beer. I would look around 2 see where it came from and some old man would lift his glass and smile!!!! It was fun dancing 2 the oldies.........that was great music. The Isleys the whispers and Ojays..............

I think that's it for now. Let me go catch up with you guys............"young buck" has been out 2 sea but he will be home for the weekend. I will devote an entire post 2 him soon!!!!! WOW!!!!

also coming soon:
"what in the world happened 2 big country" and

"What happened when the LIAR showed up at my house while young buck was here"

Have a great day!!!!!