Sunday, April 17, 2005

Why don't people"PARENT" any more????

Yesterday was a great day!! Even though I ditched a baby shower I was supposed to attend.....I couldn't afford to get a gift(a decent one anyway)...I only like to give things that I would want to recieve myself....ya know? She is having twins...that's 2 gifts......

I slept in.....8:30....yes sir- ree-bob....i'm not joshing y'all either.....maybe it was due to the fact that I was out til I was not doing the "grown-up"......Maybe it was due to the massive amount of Martinis...... Me and my girl from Vegas went out cause she is in town for the next few days for I got up andI didn't clean one dam thing cept for my body...LOL.....My friends called me to go to lunch at around 11 so we met and went to Applebee's for some viddles and drinks....What better way to fix a mild hangover? After lunch I was a good mom and picked the boys up food from their favorite spot and delivered....then went to my friends house and watched/napped through the Incredibles......low and behold...I awoke to the smell of barbeque a friends boyfriend had invited people over and they were grilling......Dam I love it when I'm in the right place at the right time...LOL

People start showing up and more and more food,drinks....we play cards talk a lil shit we are all having a great time girlfriend's daughter gets dropped off by grandma. My guy friends just moved right next door to my best's a duplex so they are connected......the girl is baaaad...really mouthy....tooo mouthy to be 6........first when there are cocktails a flowin,Kids should not be present!!!!!! 2nd: when there is shit talking going on, Kids should not be present!!!! 3rd: when there are 8 adults cursing like sailors, KIDS SHOULD NOT BE PRESENT!!!
O.k so y'all get the picture...her ass SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN THERE!! My momma used to always say and I quote "I don't give a dam if ONE person comes over....that is company and before they get their coat should be GONE!!) I raise my boys the same soon as the greetings are exchanged my boys know to dissappear.....POOF...gone......

Not only was this girl there and making her presence felt.......she was talking back to her mom(she doesn't live with her she lives with her grandma...that's a whole seperate post)...she was talking back to my friends that were hosting the barbeque said "Dee i'm gonna give her 5 minutes and i'm gonna have to say something"
Well finally she got picked up and was gone but mind you she had left quite the impression on everybody....we were sitting around the bon fire and one of my girlfriends spoke up and said"your daughter is BAD" My girlfriend had the nerve to be a lil offended!!! A couple of other people agreed...."she is"...."I would have put her in check" "she should have been in the room watching cartoons" etc...etc...y'all get the picture....

One episode that really pissed me off is when my friend told her to stay away from the fire she yelled back(well not really yelling to some but to me a kid needs to use a certain voice when speaking to an "I'm trying to go find my mother" O.k to me that's waaayyy too much....I told your bad ass to stay away from the fire and there is no need for a response....PERIOD!!!! When we called her on it, my friend had the nerve to say "she is just expressing herself" What the fuck??? Maybe i'm old school don't have no business expressing shit but school work!!! They can express hunger, fatigue and shit like that....but there is noooooo way my boys would ever, eva... eva.... eva.... speak to any adult in a loud voice! Wheter it be a family friend or a total stranger!!!

I wanted to tell her about herself but you can't tell folks shit about their kids!!! Now if we were in CASA DE DEE..... SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN SET STRAIGHT FROM THE MOMENT THEY ENTERED THE PREMISES!!!! But since it was not my crib I just sat quietly and minded my own biddness...............of course the convo turned to my boys cause most of the people there had none themselves so they use my kids a lot to compare..."Dee's boys are good" Dee's boys are well mannered" I only met Dee's son's once but they were really polite" "I like Dee's son's"
Now y'all don't think i'm bragging please don't take it the wrong way........
sorry this is such a looong post but it's something important to me.......

Maybe I am a lil "old school" but it worked for us.......I raise my boys the same way..................
I was really sad, disappointed in her...there were sooo many episodes in a 3 hour period...I don't want to bore y'all to death but last night's events really bothered me!!

~this friend just happens to be the friend that i'm thinking of seperating myself from~


Blogger Ms Pigsley said...

I am so with you on this post. Parents are afraid to parent because they are afraid the kid won't "like" them or won't think their "cool". So they let their brats run all over acting like they are the adult.

I hear little kids talking bad to parents all of the time where we live and the parents won't do anything about it because they don't want to stifle their creativity. Bull! A good butt whooping is what they need! You never hear a parent around these parts tell their kid no. You will hear a kid telling the parents no though and the parent does what the kid tells them too. My kids would have a red behond if they tried that!

8:59 AM  
Blogger Justine said...

Girl, you need to buy your friend a belt or loan her one. Shoot I wish my daughter would. Girl she be waking up from a blow to the head right about now. LOL I do not tolerate foolishness and my daughter knows mommy don't play.

2:33 PM  
Blogger YouToldHarpoTaBeatMe said...

I'm with you on this one. I've lost a few friends with "expressive" children.

I used to have the 'roped off' living room, and a former friend brought her kids over, whom she said were going a through a 'destructive' phase. So when my kids went through a 'stuck on stupid' phase, I brought them over to her house.

Tit for tat? Yeah, but those phases ended at my doorstep.

6:54 PM  
Blogger Furious said...

well i parent, but it's all for selfish reasons.... i CAN'T STAND no bad-assed children and my kids stay IN CHECK plainly because i don't want to be the one with the bad-assed children, ROFL. so my children's good behavior, it's all in my own gross self interest *muahahah* LOL

I'm totally with you. that little girl woulda got popped 50 times.

8:44 PM  
Blogger Margaret said...

Halfway through your post, I was wondering if this is the friend with the 'issues'. RIGHT I AM!!

My sister used to tell my niece 'where you give it is where you get it' (*remembering the butt whooping T got in my Aunt's kitchen*).

The question should be...why is she not raising her own kid? It sounds like the daughter doesn't respect her as an adult, let alone as her mother.

10:46 PM  
Blogger Nikki said...

Sounds like the child is in charge. I'm not a parent, but I'm a godmother, and ain't no way I'mma let my godson run over me and not behave.

8:32 AM  
Blogger epitomi said...

i understand 110%.... Raise your kids... take the time raise them, just like you took the time to make them. invest in them like you invest in shopping and chatting on the dang phone...jeez! as you can see, i am well versed in seeing folks not raising their kids. they are more like keepers of their kids... sadly, these ppl don't even know the differe. we need to have a slew of kids... you know, balance out the bad apples..:)

11:22 AM  
Blogger Dee said...

this friend doesn't have custody of her kids...her mother has them cause the "state" took them away...her youngest daughters dad whooped one of the other kids and the state came in and took them ALL! This is the same friend that I have been considering cutting out of my life for VARIOUS reasons..

6:13 PM  

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