Thursday, July 14, 2005

NO MORE LIARS!!!!

After reading the comments and reflecting on them all. I began to think this morning about my ex husband and his lies. Then the LIAR and his lies. I'm noticing a trend here!!!!

I have always been honest. Except for little white ones we all tell from time to time. As far as relationships go........i'm REAL!!!

When I hooked up with LIAR, he knew I was married but seperated. Right off the top. Straight no chaser........My ex-husband LIED about his son for 2 years and still LIES about the relationship he has with the kid!!! I didn't even know that the child had met my in-laws, until my nephew busted it out one summer when my mother-in-law brought the kids here to San Diego one summer!! I thought that my husband and I were going to work through the whole "i.have.a.baby.outside.our.marriage.but.i.want.to.keep.my.family.together.thing" Can you imagine how hurt I was finding out from my sister-in-laws 5 year old son that this child has been to Chicago SEVERAL times to meet my in-laws? How come hubby forgot to share that with me? We were supposed to be "working through it"......that my blog peeps was the final straw!!!! I called my husband as soon as I got home (he was stationed 45 mins. from Chicago. I stayed here in San Diego figuring out things and I figured the year apart would give me/us a lil clarity) WRONG!!!!! I called his ass and said "I'M DONE!!

I got so much flack from friends/family(his). My family supports me and so do the majority of my real friends!!! When you make the decision that you desrve better.......you have to stick to it!! You all would not belive some of the things people have said to me:

"dee all things can be worked out"
you work it out with his untrusworthy ass!!!

"dee cheating husband is a good man"
you marry his cheating untrustworthy ass!!!

"dee being a single mom is hard"
not sleeping at night wondering who your husband is fucking is harder!!!

"dee it's hard to raise boys alone they need a positive male in their lives"
tell me what's so positive about their dad getting a girl pregnant and hiding it from EVERYBODY for a year and a half?

I figured shit, my mom did it making a WHOLE lot less than me!!!! She raised me and my lil brother making peanuts!!!! I'm strong...........I deserve better!!!!

I have to constantly remind myself................I DESERVE BETTER!!!! sOME DAYS/NITES i STILL CRY MYSELF TO SLEEP WONDERING WHY????

WHY DID HE DO IT?

WHY DID HE LIE?

WHY DID HE HIDE IT FROM ME?

WHY CAN'T HE STILL COME CLEAN?

WHY SHOULD I HAVE SETTLED FOR HALF A HUSBAND?


Maybe God is just preparing me for my prince..........................I will not "settle" I refuse!!! I am a good woman with a good heart!!! I'm smart, educated, have a good job, keep a clean house and can cook my ASS off!!!! I do tend to have a terrible mouth when provoked.............LOL I cuss like a sailor and lub to get my drink on..............but hell i'm still a good catch!!! RIGHT???

19 Comments:

Blogger Golden... said...

Hey girl! Been MIA for a minute! need to catch up on this tonight! Hope all is well!

http://mi_casa.blogs.com

8:13 AM  
Blogger Aziza said...

Dee, try not to be too hard on yourself. Many of us have fallen for the jive talk/tricks/games from the pimpdaddies. But that is the past. And like you said, God might be preparing you to meet the right man.

8:29 AM  
Blogger mrs.tj said...

You know you have to go thru the frogs to find the prince.
You got what you really needed out of ex-hubby. 2 beautiful children. His loss....
Holla!

8:32 AM  
Blogger Daisy Mae said...

You are damn right you are a good catch! You don't need no lying bastard husband dragging you down. There are some good men out there that will treat you like a princess.

I was married to a lying no good piece of crap who 12 years after the divorce stills trys to make my life hell. But I got rid of him and found a prince who puts me on a pedastal. He may crack toilet seats but he is a prince and doesn't lie. Yours is out there!

8:43 AM  
Blogger Butter Pecan said...

All I can say is just be patient and let your prince come to you. He will in due time. You have had a few bad experiences but you have also learned from those experiences so when your prince arrive you will be prepared. Just relax and chill for a while. Get Ya Mind Right b/c you are already on the right track. Stay strong for your boys, so they will know how to treat a good woman like yourself when they grow up.

8:46 AM  
Blogger Brandi said...

HELL YEA YOU ARE! Listen to me girlie, I don't give a fuck who says you should of stayed with that liar. You did the best thing for you and your kids!
Who the hell needs to worry everytime their man walks out the door if they are really going to work or going to screw the ho down the street. Not me. That's for damn sure!

You will find a good man to treat you with the respect you deserve. I promise!

10:24 AM  
Blogger Kayla said...

Hell yeah! You are the bomb! Any nucca who can't see that, don't even need to be up in the same space as you! You hear me? Aint nothing wrong with you. It's them! As for those who wanted you to stay with the LIAR..I don't mean not disrespect if they are family or friends, but 'uck' em! You have to be happy, and since you know you can't settle for less than what you deserve, you aint gone be happy with him! You keep doing you, sweetie. Your man will come. That's what everybody keeps telling me. LOL

10:51 AM  
Blogger Nikki said...

Mrs. TJ, my granny had a similar saying. She said, "You have to go through a lot of weeds before you find that rose."

And Dee, you'll find that rose.

11:47 AM  
Blogger Msnhim said...

Do you girl.... Men come and go and some are wonderful and some aren't but you focus on you and yours and you''ll be alright...

1:34 PM  
Anonymous Juanita said...

A good catch indeed! A true prince will take you any which way and love you morning, noon, and night! I hope a true prince is in the works for you...Lord knows you definitely deserve better!!

3:48 PM  
Blogger sonyared said...

yeah, I ain't mad atchoo. people think by saying stay with your man they are doing you some kind of service...puleazze. They not in your shoes and if they are, they probably tellin' you to stay with him to make their own selves feel better because they are constantly wondering what there man is doing. Misery loves company. Good for you

6:07 PM  
Blogger MeCrazyMe said...

Girl... there is so much I want to say because this sounds like my life, only difference I was not in love, but i was trying to keep it together for my son. When I finally decided to leave him alone (not because he had a child behind my back to) I found love in a long time friend.

This is what I would like to advise you.

1. Take a deep breath.
2. Know that what happened is not your fault!
3. Put those loving feeling that you have for him into your child.
4. Think about what you have learned and use it when you get involved again. I won't say love because love is overated.
5. "Love" will find you, only when you find yourself. Believe me I have been in your shoes.....
**Wish you nothing, but future happiness.
PS: I want to say so much, but I didn't want to clog your blog ** LOL **

7:11 PM  
Blogger Myrah said...

(crack) right in the jaw of Liar!
(bang) banging Liars head into the wall
(boof) kicking Liar in balls and pulling the heel of my 3" battle pumps out of his flesh as he grunts

(smack) smacking Liar in the forehead with the palm with my freshly French manicured hand.

(snatch) snatchin Liars head up by his hair while he still groans

"This is for being the Liar you are and for hurting Dee"
(Dragging him by his hair over to Dee sitting calmly in her chair getting her drink on and watching the whole thing.)

Myrah: say your sorry
Liar: sorryyyyyyyyy (weak wimpy voice all hunched over in pain)
Myrah: Tell her you are a pathetic liar who messed up a good thing!

He weeps and says all the right things.

I pull out my sword and stab Liar in the hand straight to the floor. Pinning him down. He can't move.

Myrah: (arms folded walking slowly around Liar bleeding on the floor)

You live only if Dee says you live. But it ends here.

Dee about to answer___________

To be continued....



***It's on you Dee.... are you ready to let him go??? Mentally, Physically and from your heart? Either way you choose if he lives or dies in your world, this is it.... you have to let him go either way.

Your better than him and your new good thing can't come into your life until you let Liar go.

Myrah's waitin on an answer!
--------------
hugs ooo kisses xoxox

9:43 PM  
Blogger The Princess Herself said...

Diva..
You are telling my life story! My life has been filled with liars and cheaters.

"dee being a single mom is hard"
not sleeping at night wondering who your husband is fucking is harder!!!
--aint that the truth!
Peace and Love to you!

6:49 AM  
Blogger Nia said...

Liars are the worse people to love...because in the end you find out the person you loved never really existed. Fudge em'!

7:41 AM  
Blogger Zantiferous3 said...

Nia said it ALL. And that's the most heartbreaking thing of all... knowing that the person you fell in love with doesn't even exist. Mmph. PREACH NIA!!!! *walking away waving handkerchief*

8:54 AM  
Blogger epitomi said...

hell yeah youre a good catch. there is nothing like deceit and not giving folks the truth to deal with so they can react accordingly. you did the right thing... YOU know YOUR tolerance levels. damn who said what and when they said it.... what does that has to do with the price of gum in scotland? holla are you resilience!!

8:59 AM  
Anonymous Reddy said...

"dee being a single mom is hard"
not sleeping at night wondering who your husband is fucking is harder!!!"

Damnnnnnnnn.. that sentence hit me in a really deep part of my gut.. It's like the emotion jumped off the page and smacked the hell outta me.. Ouch.

Dee i'm glad that you're out of that situation, stay strong my sista.

9:19 PM  
Blogger Furious said...

wow dee. i've missed a lot. either way, i'm not of the thinking that you should stay in a marriage for the sake of the children. if shit is a wreck then they'll just grow up thinking that's the way it's supposed to be. best thing you can do is instill values and pray that they'll grow up to be good men.

6:27 PM  

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