Friday, January 27, 2006

I really liked dude.........

I liked him, I really did. He made me laugh.......he made me smile........all the time!!!!

Then I felt he was moving fast............I just wanted to slow it down a lil bit!!!!

He got mad when I introduced him as my "friend".......

I thought that when you get into a relationship both parties had to talk about it..sign some paperwork, give each other dap(handshake), drink on it or something...........

Dude showed up at my house!!!! Yeah he called 123,865,999 times during the day but when I talked to him that morning I told him I didn't feel well and I would be going to sleep after work!!!!

Maybe he really was worried when he kept calling all through the day and I didn't answer...........

Dam when dude SHOWED.THE.FUCK.UP.AT.MY.DOOR he didn't have even a box of kleenex, no NYQUIL, no orange juice or chicken soup................what the hell????

It has been brought to my attention that I din't give dude a fair chance.............

Yeah I may have been a BITCH for cussing him the hell out but I meant it!!!!! You don't just come to my house talking about you were worried.....................

DUDE I HAVE A FUCKING COLD NOT THE PLAGUE OR WEST NILE VIRUS!!!!!!!

Am I wrong????? Did I over-react???? I have a gurlfriend who seems to think I was a lil HARSH...........whatever...........

I know that you all will give it to me straight with no chaser!!!! LOL

Yeah I talked to him yesterday night........he said he was really sorry and yadda yadda..............I reminded him again that it's not cool to show up at my house EVER............without me saying it's o.k. He seemed to understand.................

Do I give dude another chance or do I kick him to the curb???

Are my RED.FLAGS legit or am I just being a pessimist(sp?)???

What do y'all think??????

27 Comments:

Blogger That Girl Tam said...

I say RED FLAGS are important signals that people fail to recognize. Go with your first instinct...that's why you have them. Do not second guess yourself...that's the problem with a lot of people, they lack trust in themselves. He kinda creeps me out...on the real...his initials ain't M.B. are they? Shit I'm for real on that one! HAHAHA....he sounds kinda stalkerish...

3:21 PM  
Blogger DJ Diva said...

yeah...that why we all were saying take it slow...stalkerish tendencies are never good...

But I'm fittin ta spank you...

That's what you get for giving up the goodies...U may wanna wait next time and figure out if you want him as your man first...so your ll na na don't throw some man over the edge LMBO!!!!!

3:31 PM  
Blogger Melinda said...

Only you know what to do but if something makes you uneasy now ALWAYS trust your instincts.

Stop putting you crazy good loving on them until you know he aint crazy..You know half ass in the bedroom...LOL i am just kidding, well sorta!

4:02 PM  
Blogger Melinda said...

Only you know what to do but if something makes you uneasy now ALWAYS trust your instincts.

Stop putting you crazy good loving on them until you know he aint crazy..You know half ass in the bedroom...LOL i am just kidding, well sorta!

4:03 PM  
Blogger BajanQueen said...

I don't know.....

I agree with that girl tam Go with your 1st instinct!

You know what you want and when you find it you will know it!! N0 second guessing nothing!!!

I hope things work out for ya babes...

Here's hoping you have a good weekend.

~Smooches~

4:33 PM  
Blogger SmartBlkWoman said...

Go with the first instinct and cut him loose. Months from now when he finally freaks you out to a point that you can't get over you'll be like, "damn, I shoulda let him go months ago!"

Believe me.

5:26 PM  
Anonymous Reddy said...

Girllllllllllllllll..

Those flags are not just red.. they are on fucking fire right now.. Burning stronger than a cali wildfire if ya get my drift.

Run like hell...

8:31 PM  
Blogger chele said...

Dee -- I don't think his behavior is a deal breaker. Yeah, he crossed the line by showing up unannounced ... but ya'll are still getting to know each other. Perhaps, he didn't know the boundaries. Perhaps his last woman liked the 'pop-in'. Who knows? I'm not saying you over-reacted because I would have done the same thing. I'm saying that if you really like him than you should give him another chance. If you think he's clear on the boundaries than move forward ... if he steps outta line again kick his ass.

4:58 AM  
Blogger princessdominique said...

I think that if your rule is call before you come stick to that, simple. Now as far as seeing him again, if you like him, and are enjoying him there is nothing wrong with going out "as friends"--see my yesterday's post. It may have been harsh how you came across but certain situations warrant that, but fact is that's why you have the rule in place...if he steps out of line again he gets the AXE!

8:17 AM  
Blogger TTD said...

i agree wit chele. dont cut him loose yet since you really did like him.. give him another chance and make sure its clear to him what the boundaries are.. no poppin up.. no million phone calls.. that you two are movin S-L-O-W!! it's hard to come across a good man.. don't let one go just b/c things weren't made clear.. he's from the south.. he doesn't know any better.. lol

8:20 AM  
Blogger Honest said...

I have to co sign with Melinda. You're the best judge of what is right for you. Go with your instincts.

9:33 AM  
Blogger Sonnyredd said...

He is looking (in my opinion) for something that you can't give hime right now, and that is a relationship. While you want to ease into it, he is ready. Let it go.

10:03 AM  
Blogger Courtney said...

Trust your gut! That doesn't mean that he's not a nice guy; it could just mean that he's not the guy for you. No harm in that.

c

3:37 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I agree with everyone else... Always go with what your instincts tell you.

7:11 PM  
Blogger "N" Search of Ecstasy said...

I must agree with the others who say trust your first instincts.

11:07 PM  
Blogger Brandi said...

I think you should discuss the things your comfortable with this early in a relationship. Let him know your rules then if he breaks them you have every right to kick his ass to the curb.

I think you should give him one more chance....but still be prepared to be done with him!

Good Luck

5:22 AM  
Blogger African girl, American world said...

all I know is the bits and pieces that you drop here so I'm guessing thats like 25% of the story.

My red flag went up when you said he wanted you to stop cussing and I know you said you needed to anyway BUT to me that really made me think he wanted to change you and that is my #1 deal breaker.

You know your heart and I know you don't take no mess so talk to him and lay it out for him and if he still keeps it up then let him go and find keep on looking.

10:02 AM  
Blogger sonyared said...

Girl, I am the first one to flip out if any man invades my privacy!(showing up 2 my house unannounced) Oh hell no and u have kids there...People have to respect space..and I feel things should be talked out and never to assume anything until the 2 parties have talked it over. I do feel u should atleast give him an explanation...u may be turned off now especially after the 50,000 calls and u need some space. Overall just talk 2 him and let him know what u r looking for ;)

6:06 PM  
Anonymous Nikki said...

First of all, you don't just show up at someone's house unannounced. Worried or not, he's not your man.

6:12 PM  
Blogger Cutie Cola said...

I would say that was a little harsh too, but I too hate when ANYBODY just shows up at my crib and thinks it's cool to do that. So.....I'm kinda on the fence i guess.

7:44 PM  
Blogger Kayla said...

It was deinitely not cool of him to stop by without calling, whether that was mentioned or not. Y'all are just getting to know one another and he doesn't have it like that yet; if he can get that far and you so choose to do that. Anyway, I don't believe you were harsh. I believe you told him what your intentions were for that day and he should have respected that, whether you answered his calls or not.

It's really all about what you think/feel, Dee. If you can't forgive him or if you're tired of the bugga boo act, then walk away.. If you feel you can work things out, then do so. I wish you well, chica!

8:30 PM  
Anonymous o said...

A little late with my two cents, but here we go anyway. I know from your posts that you probably like the adult fun, and that he generally behaves himself, and he doesn't seem to like the liars. So those things all militate towards keeping him in the picture. But he showed up unannounced, he called 5011 times, and he went a bit possessive with the whole "we're a couple" thing. I'm a safety-first kinda guy, and so if you feel you are safe, then I'd say proceed with the communication and try to set boundaries. If you have even the slightest incling that his concern is misplaced as far as how he's coming off about it, I say throw him back in the ocean. Thing about you is that you have a great smile and a generally easygoing disposition, so even though you don't take no shi#, it won't be long before his replacement suitor steps up.

11:59 PM  
Blogger Msnhim said...

You know whats best for you... Try to give it a minute and think about everything. Weigh the good against the bad and make a decision based on whats best for YOU.

7:15 AM  
Blogger P said...

Dee:

Read your last few blogs, I added some comments. I haven't commented on the past two because my dumb a$$ had your link on my blog on one of your archive pages and like a duh, I kept clicking it and was like "Uh, why come Dee haven't wrong nuthin". (Tam's the one that brought it to my attention).

But er, back to the lecture at hand. . .

Ooh, he broke relationship rule 101, you do NOT (insert Chris Tucker voice) Eva, Eva EVER Eva come over somebody's house unannounced that you are dating, so not cool.

In reading this, I feel bad for the brother. Not feel bad in the way of you dogged him out, I feel bad because he doesn't know that this quasi-desparation that he is exhibiting is turning you off. . .

He (obviously unbeknownst to him) is forcing you to retreat to a point of no return with him.

Yes, I understand he likes the Diva.

Yes, I understand that he's been up for the down stroke and likes that, too.

But brother, If I could talk to you, I would tell ya to back up ya turning us off. (yes, I said us)

As for you giving him a second chance, tread lightly. For you, considering he prolly feels stronger for you and that might give you a case of irritatable-itis, and for him, so that he won't get caught up into something that will be difficult for him to transition out of.

8:39 AM  
Blogger P said...

I'm back.

Ugh!

I am so bothered that he came over your house unannounced. I am so not feeling that.

8:41 AM  
Blogger No One said...

My advice, RUN! Get the FUCK away from this guy!! He sounds like someone I would end up with. He's a crazy bitch already, get rid of him! It'll only get worse!!!

1:08 PM  
Blogger Icey said...

I know I am late but listen to your FIRST instinct! That is wild that he showed up at your house with out calling and confirming...in the words of our favorite crackhead "hell to the naw"...dude would have been still chilling outside my door!

Be careful Diva!

12:30 PM  

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